I just stumbled upon an amazing discovery. I'm writing a magazine article that is due at the end of the week, and I have a talk coming up next month on the same subject, "Being Authentically You." I was looking back through my very first blog, trying to remember how it felt to be leading two separate lives. When I was flying, I didn't let anyone at work know about my "alternative life" as a drum circle attending, personal growth retreat facilitating, energy medicine practitioner. And then when I was staffing a retreat I didn't talk about flying.
As I was going back through my old blog, I started getting more and more excited. "There is some great stuff I could use in here," I thought to myself. I secretly hoped that my book might already be written, and all I had to do was go back through and compile my old blog posts. Then I heard my mother's voice in my head saying, "Don't get your hopes up, this might not work out."
With those words, I realized how much of my life I have spent trying not to get too excited, so if something didn't work out I was already prepared for the disappointment. My motto used to be, "Expect the worst, and then I might be pleasantly surprised but will never be disappointed." This was obviously before I learned anything about Law of Attraction or the Secret. I didn't realize at the time that I am the creator of my own reality, and that I will notice more of whatever it is that I focus my attention on - so why not focus my attention on things turning out wonderfully instead of things going wrong?
The problem with the "expect the worst" line of thinking was that I was often unnecessarily disappointed, since I allowed myself to feel the disappointment before it even happened. Things had a 50/50 chance of working out, but I was always focused on the negative side instead of the positive.
This little voice in my head was a huge gift to me today. When I first heard it, it completely deflated my enthusiasm. I thought, "Oh right, this might not work out." Then I caught what I was doing and asked a question instead. "What would it take for this to turn out even better than I could imagine?" The smile returned to my face, the little excited feeling in my chest came back, and I was filled with hope instead of disappointment. I think I'd rather feel that instead.
So I wonder, what could you create today if you DID get your hopes up? I'd love to hear about it if you want to share.